We all know of Rudolph and his shining nose
And we all know Frosty who's made out of snowBut all of those stories seem kind of... gay'Cause we all know who brightens up our holiday
Mr. Hankey the Christmas PooSmall and brown he comes from youSit on the toilet here he comesSqueeze him 'tween your festive buns
A present from down belowSpreading joy with a "Howdy-Ho!"He's seen the love inside of you'Cause he's a piece of poo
Sometimes he's nuttySometimes he's cornyHe can be brown or greenish brown(Mmmmhmmm!)But if you eat fiber on Christmas eveHe might come to your town!
Mr. Hankey the Christmas PooHe loves me, I love youTherefore, vicariously he loves you!
I can make a Mr. Hankey too! (Pffffft)
Well Kyle where is he?Ehh . He's coming!Come on dude, push!Ehhhh... I'm Trying!Wait, wait I can see his head!Here he comes!
Howdy Ho!
I'm Mr. Hankey the Christmas PooSeasons Greetings to all of you!Let's sing songs and dance and playNow before I melt away.
Here's a game I like to playStick me in your mouth and try to sayHowdy ho ho yum yum yumChristmas Time has come!
Singers: Sometimes He's runnySometimes he's firmSometimes he practically water.Sometimes he hangs off the end of your assAnd wont fall in the toilet'Cause he's just clinging to your sphincterAnd he wont drop off . and so you shake your ass aroundAnd try to get it to drop in the toilet and finally it does.
Mr. Hankey the Christmas PooWhen Christmas leaves he must leave too.Flush him down but he's never goneHis smell and his spirit linger on.
Howdy Ho!
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